and a school year begins!

it makes me so happy to be able to share these photos.
(click on the photos to enlarge them)

what a journey!
one village and a handful of volunteers later, the school year begins!
i am proud to have been a part of this.
i hope you are too!

the final blog / post-africa reflections

i've now been back for nearly three weeks and can safely say i feel i'm home. and as the title of this blog is 'meagan in africa' - this really will be the final post. so thank you again for following along.

as i think i posted as early as day one of my return to the US, i'm amazed at how easy it's been for me to slip back into life in america. and i find myself slightly disappointed at how comfortable i am. or perhaps it's a sense of guilt that i'm just not sure what to do with. i knew i wouldn't return home, shave my head, give away my possessions and pick up a few more peasant skirts at the local goodwill. i knew that wasn't the answer, or my answer anyway. but i suppose it's the decided lack of an answer that is making it difficult.

or perhaps it's the fact that i can flop onto the couch, flip on the wide-screen and catch the last half of the rose ceremony on 'the bachelorette' and not have the inclination to TURN IT OFF. or the fact that i can walk into a walmart the size of brikama and enjoy the convenience. or the fact that driving to officemax to buy some print cartridges excites me to no end (a car! a printer! aisles and aisles of gadgets!)

don't get me wrong, this is NOT an anti-american, anti-consumer, anti-convenience rage. i've been there, done that, written the essay on the evils of the cereal aisle and costco-sized america. but it's figuring out how to reconcile the realities of living in the first world with what i know now about how they live in the third-world. and reconciling this on a micro-level. i.e. my life.

because i don't want to simply forget about what i've done, or about the sarr family, or the village of makumbaya. it's very easy to say that i've come back much more grateful for what i have, and appreciative of the opportunity i am afforded here in the united states. but all that is just talk talk talk talk talk, dinner party fodder, impressive storytelling. and that's all well and good, but is that enough?

i think this experience has shown me that there are a lot of people in this world who WANT to help, who want to be a part of the solution, to affect change, but who just don't know how, or don't have the means. and i say this from both sides - from the outpouring of support - financially and emotionally - i received from the generous donors for the nursery project after just a few weeks. but also from the africans who desperately WANT to dig themselves out of the hole they find themselves in but just don't have the skills or know-how to do so. there is a missing link that is metaphorically keeping people chained to their own side of the fence instead of linking them together for the good of the world.

so i continue to struggle with what i've seen. i can't single-handedly change the plight of africa. i know this. but i CAN make sure that fatou sarr has enough to eat, and that she can make it through high school. i can 'be the difference'* in her life. but in order to do that, i have to remember. i can't forget.

* ('be the difference' - the tagline for marquette university, where i'll be starting my masters program this fall, which i shamelessly and profusely littered throughout my application essay (come on, wouldn't you?), but which i now FULLY understand!)

and i hope that if you are reading this, it has somehow encouraged you to 'be the difference' in your own life - and has shown you, if nothing else, that it is possible to make a difference. thanks for helping me to build this nursery. let me know how i can help with yours.

my uncle kindly reminded me of a very important quote, which i think sums up my feelings about all this very nicely:

'to whom much is given, much is expected.'

indeed.

and with that. adieu.
saala malekum!

A few more videos of note

when you have time, some of these are really cute!

here is kaddy attempting to say hello to my family. gambian's don't do 'th' very well.


and here is fatou sarr with my favorite giggle:


the toerne dance makes it to the gambia - spot the white girl (just a taste of what the dancing was like):


and here is some REAL african dancing by the kids at school:

from start to FINISH: Friends of Fatou Nursery!

remember what the nursery looked like back in february:





and through the weeks the villagers came to help:






or at least most did!



and once the foundation was laid, the 'fun' began:

the masoners crafted a chalkboard


the signboard was cleaned and painted


the artist began sketching and painting


the teachers were chosen and training began


food was prepared in preparation for the 'program'


the chairs and benches were built (nearly finished!)



the mural/artistry is nearly completed:



the uniforms and badges are finished!



and the festivities begin!







the villagers present me with speeches and gifts:



the speeches are VERY long:


and at school the next day, more speeches and gifts:



and my goodbyes (and last meal):




and my life, once again (for the last time?) in three bags:


and here - a quick walking tour of the nursery!

good morning america!

my first morning back in america and i woke at 4.45 to the sounds of the pipes gurgling and the computer fan humming. new sounds for me. indeed, my first night of sleep in the UK last saturday morning (got back from the airport at 5:45am!) was a strange experience with the fabric softened sheet smells tickling my nose and the refrigerator hum finally lulling me to sleep around 7. it's been lovely to be back, to see everyone, and to indulge in some of the creature comforts i'd forgotten. (bacon, eggs, frapuccinos, long baths, new razor blades, electricity and flush toilets, barbecues, etc). thanks to the gang in london for such an enjoyable weekend back in the first world.

there were, however, a few strange moments. standing in covent garden, waiting for a friend, people watching. i couldn't help but wonder what jainaba or ebrima might think of the 'scene' - how totally overwhelmed and flabbergasted they'd be that such scenes exist. uber-trendy londoners, skinny jeaned-up with their jackie o sunglasses and iron-straight hair - all heading somewhere quickly, with purpose. nothing gambian about central london. but it struck me as bizarre that such disparity exists in the world. where 24 hours previously i'd woken up on a compound in 90 degree calming (debilitating?) heat, and there i was 24 hours later in a coat, standing in a frenzied whirl of activity. as you can imagine, we didn't last long in covent garden and enjoyed a coffee along the thames.

i'm actually a little shocked at how quickly i've slipped right back into the life i know. not difficult without the roosters and donkeys as my alarm clock - still, i thought i might find things here a little more shocking. but on the drive back from the chicago airport, the landscape i remember - the strip malls, sprawling flatlands, six-lane highways with SUVs and monster trucks passing, michele norris with the NPR news, fast-food chains and gas at $3.55/gallon - all seem so familiar. i have to pinch myself to remember that i've actually been away for three months.

i've got to come up with my elevator pitch on africa to the question 'how was it?' ... how to answer that question succinctly without boring the listener who was probably expecting 'it was great! how are YOU?' i'm still working on that answer, and i think it'll take a bit more distance to properly reflect on the experience. or maybe i should just point them to the blog and let them follow along, belatedly.

i'm uploading new pics as i type this - so i'll have a link shortly. in the meantime. here are a few more pics to view. i'll get the nursery pics up in a separate posting so that they are all together!

insha'allah

sometimes i am thankful for gambian inefficiencies ... because i'm sitting in the airport first class lounge on an expired priority lounge pass. they didn't look at the date (as i hoped, though i was fully prepared to return to the regular lounge if they had, no arguments). but they didn't, so now i've got internet connection and free refreshments. so this will REALLY be my last posting from the gambia. my flight takes off in two hours time.

saying my goodbyes in makumbaya was actually quite emotional this afternoon. i didn't think i was going to cry - i was certain the excitement for getting home would strangle any tears that might well up. but they came anyway.

it's been a long drawn out week of goodbyes. what seemed like the ENTIRE village came out yesterday afternoon for a program at the nursery school to thank me with song, dance, speeches and gifts. at one point, i counted over 120 people, and that was just the women and children as the men went to pray. they had to get a microphone for the speeches there were so many people. it was AWESOME, to say the least. the women's group got up and gave a speech, and then pulled me to the center for some african dancing. embarrassment is not an emotion they have or know in africa - so despite the fact that i looked like a frustrated chicken flapping around - it was great fun. the speeches were given in both mandinka and english, so they went on for about 45 minutes - but all to say they were VERY very grateful for everything i'd done on the project. i was very honored, and i hope that all of you will feel very honored as well when you see the photos and videos of what YOU have helped me to do. really, it feels as though i did very little apart from facilitate this connection. i took lots of pictures and you'll see them when i have the chance to upload them here.

and today was my last day at the school which was effectively an excuse for no school for the kids. friday is only a half day anyway, so it's not a huge loss. the girls had a football (soccer) match for the first half of the morning and then there was a school assembly to thank me and to sing songs and to give me a parting gift. (an african wooden mask). they, too, were very kind with their words and i got lots of requests for my address and phone number from the kids who want to stay in touch. unlikely that they will get their own email addresses for a few years yet, but there are a few who i expect *might* just send me a letter one day. we shall see.

i've hardly slept at all these last few nights. and this morning was no different, up at 5am with the call to prayer. but this time, i didn't mind laying in the dark, listening to the sounds of the gambia waking and watching the sunrise through my mosquito net. it would be the last rooster crowings, donkey brayings, cricket chirpings. tomorrow i'll wake up in brixton to the sounds of london. very different sounds indeed.

so these last few days i've been exhausted, wanting to sleep, but unable lest i miss a moment of what remained of my african experience. my eyes are tired and red and i'd like to say i'll collapse into a deep sleep when i get to my aisle seat, but monarch airlines are not the most comfortable charter, so that is unlikely. and the returning (mostly) english tourists are finishing their last julbrews and are likely to be a fairly motley crew. i'm happy i don't have to sit in the regular lounge to watch them. i'd much prefer to spend my last few hours in the gambia in this quiet room, in a comfortable chair. because my gambian experience was SO much different than their fleeting, sunburned, and packaged experience. i don't really want to share in theirs, and they are very generous with their spirit(s) down in the lounge just now.

the girls and children of the compound actually left yesterday - somewhat unexpectedly, so my time with them was cut short by one day. and a few of the children (the smaller ones, including fatou sarr) left with their uncle without saying goodbye. or rather, i'm not sure they knew they wouldn't see me again. i must say it felt rather like someone wrenched a piece of my heart out. but in hindsight, it may have been for the better, because chances are i might have been pretty emotional! not for me so much, although i AM sad that i won't get to see them again, and likely won't. but emotional and sad because unless things change dramatically in makumbaya for the sarr family, it's likely that the fate of little fatou sarr will be rather predictable. which is to say, not much will happen for her. and that makes me sad.

so yesterday and today were quiet on the compound front with only a few people left. but the night before last was spent with all the women and children making these pancake balls of dough for the program's refreshments. (sandra - eat your heart out, we had at least 3 laundry buckets full of balls!) so it felt like a lovely way to end my time with them as well. and the girls got me a necklace and a bracelet and another piece of fabric as parting gifts. and though it was sad to see them go early, we had a lovely goodbye.

but let me not end on a sad note - because this has been an amazing experience and i have been touched in so many ways - probably many more i'll only discover upon my return. and i have been blessed with friendships and a community of people who have truly taught me the meaning of 'it takes a village...' last night, as we were walking back from the program, one of the village elders (which is to say, someone probably my dad's age, but they are referred to as the elders, sorry dad) said to me that they have a saying in the gambia. it's paraphrased here, clearly much more eloquent in mandinka - but he said 'if you kill a deer and give the meat away, you are likely to forget who you gave the meat to; but if you are the one who is given the meat, you will always remember who gave it to you.' he said that's how it was in makumbaya and that they would always remember fatou sarr. and i hope i am not the person who gives the meat and then forgets. i'm sure it won't happen anytime soon (and there is no way this is possible because i was given four african dresses yesterday, which brings the african dress count up to more than i care to admit for fear of ridicule. let's just say i'm set for fancy dress parties for years to come. 'oh guess what meagan's going to be this year?...' '...is she going to be an african woman AGAIN?')

as i sit here, they are continuing to call passengers on my flight to the baggage area for inspection, i'm crossing my fingers they don't end up calling my name because they've spotted the jar of palm wine oil i've smuggled home and the two mangos fresh from the tree that i've stuffed inside my tennis shoes for breakfast tomorrow morning. i just wanted one last taste of africa. insha'allah .... if god is willing, i will get them home. thank you africa.

if you know what life is worth ...

... you will look for yours on earth.

how many times have i sung that song and never actually stopped to think about the words? (get up, stand up ... bob marley). that was playing in the gellah gellah on the way into brikama and it made me reflect on my time here in africa, and what life will be like when i return to the US. in fact, i've spent much of the last few days thinking about this experience - laughing with sandra about our ups and downs, wondering what will come of the sarr family who i've grown to love, wondering if i'll ever see them again, if i'll ever return to the gambia.

this is likely to be the last post i write from africa as i don't think i'll make it back to an internet cafe after today. i'll follow up with more pics when i get back to the US, and perhaps some final reflections. maybe i'll do that while sitting in a coffeeshop sipping a latte and eating a muffin. OHMYGOD, imagine! i'm salivating here in the african heat.

there's so many things i'll take with me from this experience. or try, at least: living simply; a morning routine; the joy of reading and writing again; a new definition of what it means to be 'broke,' 'starving,' 'bored,' 'hot,' '(im)patient'; the idea that 'today is for you, tomorrow is for me'; and SO much more that it would be impossible to capture everything here.

i won't miss eating fish with crunchy bones; chickens, dogs and cats picking at my feet when i drop rice; bumster guys yelling 'hey bosslady' at me; children getting whacked; offers of marriage (however amusing); mosquitos in my room; showering with thongs; squatting with a headlamp at 2 in the morning; a razor that squeeks with each pull; a layer of dust on everything; and probably other things i won't even realize until i'm back and don't have to deal with them anymore.

but there's a lot i will miss: beautiful smiles accompanied by hellos and how's-de-days; long spaces of time for myself, guiltily enjoying daydreams; mangos; bucket showers (yes, bucket showers - especially by moonlight or in the heat of the day with lake-temperature water); lively and animated conversations, despite not understanding them; the rice-imposed weight loss program; living in a neighborhood where kids run free and everyone knows everyone; living with 2 long-sleeves, 3 tank-tops, 2 long-shorts, and 1 skirt (aka simply!); the tapalapa (bread); being called 'fatou sarr' as i walk through the village!

i know that i am going to take away a profound sense of appreciation for what i have. and by 'have' i do not mean the material things - though those will be nice, no doubt. a house with electricity, running water, and a toilet sounds just grand. but grateful, rather, for all of the opportunities that i have. to study, to work, to live well, to have healthcare, to love passionately and expressively, to control - where it is possible - my future, to dream with possibility. i know i've appreciated these things - but only in a thoughtless way. thoughtless as in literally 'without thought' - but i certainly have a greater understanding of what these things mean and how lucky i am.

but let that 'luck' not turn to complaisance, that is probably the single biggest wish for myself upon my return. yes, and especially now, i DO know what life is worth ... and i will look for mine on earth.

more when i've crossed continents for the last time for awhile... thanks for sharing the journey with me!